Growing

 

I believe people that really know me know that I believe in Christ. I have always tried to do what I felt was right, what the spirit was prompting me to do. I have not always gotten it right. I've occasionally been misled, acted impulsively, had a hard heart or a lazy attitude. At times I have disappointed family and friends.

God says we need to come to him with a broken heart and a contrite spirit. I feel so now. It is painful to face our errors, mistakes, character flaws and weaknesses. But we cannot progress unless we humble ourselves and learn to do God's will. In helping me today my daughter said that when I fall I always get up. That was a wonderful compliment as I feel I have fallen so many times. 

One must be careful not to allow despair when one faces their flaws. That would be Satan's plan. Christ wants us to suffer only to where it causes us to repent. 

Today I learned that I still worry about what others think of me. I've let go of so much of that but there still seem to be spaces that it seeps in. I am grateful for a loving God that gently teaches me what I need to do to be a better person. It is difficult but it is the only way I can live. I have been taught again today that I need to lose myself (in other words stop looking in at my insecurities) and look out to see how I can help others.

Christ took on not only our sins, but all our pains, temptations and illnesses. He is the only one that can truly judge us. He is the only one that fully understands if we are doing the best we can.