Hope

I'm a bit discouraged today. I've lost one home and I'm about to lose another. I moved in with my daughter after separating from my husband last year. We were lucky enough to sell our home for what it was worth. So we walked away with nothing but we beat forclosure by days. Now, due to temporary disability, my kids are looking at having to leave their home as well.

The other reason I'm discouraged is physical. I've struggled with chronic fatigue for the last couple of years. I'm a doer so this is tough for me. I was a sickly kid where the majority of my entertainment was through books. Thus began my love of reading. Then in my late 20s my husband decided we were going to be pig farmers. Now there's an adventure for a mother of three young children. Especially since my husband worked away from home for days and sometimes weeks on end. This meant I was going to be a pig farmer.

Now here is where hope comes in. This was a very difficult time for us for many reasons but it also gave us some of the greatest gifts. First, it taught me and the kids how to work. And believe me we worked hard. That training gave my sons the strength to overcome the odds. They reached out of poverty to put themselves through college, gain success in their fields and become good husbands and fathers. I believe the lessons from those days helped us develop compassion and certainly problem solving skills. You have to think out of the box when you are running a farm on a shoe string.

So now I've come to circumstances where I can't just dig in and push through barriers. My body just won't let me. In my first marriage we moved often (17 times in 7 years). So I became very good at moving. In the 90's I had to call my two oldest sons to help me move. I remember crying on the phone and telling one son, "I can't lift the washing machine anymore." He replied, "Mom you should never have had to."

There's my second reason for hope. How can I wallow in misery when I have such wonderful children? I'm a spiritual person. I believe in angels and therefore demons as well. The dark side would have us be discouraged, overwhelmed and confused. While God would have us call upon him for strength. I know if we ask for help He will either give us the path to clear our problems or the strength to endure them. Truth is just a prayer away. Wherever we are is a good enough place to begin. So while I wonder what will become of me I know whatever comes will be for my good if I lean on the Lord. So there is my third and strongest reason for hope! Man, even our closest friends and family members are fallible but God is constant. I believe we have angels watching over us if we are trying our best to do the right.